Mid-Way Through First Stop

We are two weeks into our month-long stay on Hilton Head Island, SC; this being our first stop on our road trip. The experience has been slightly confusing since this stop is a combination of summer vacation and also the commencement of a long road trip ahead. Perfecting the art of beach bumming, endless bike rides and splash-filled swims in the pool have definitely captured the essence of summer. Yet, knowing that I do not know what comes next has propelled me into recklessly abandoning any planning or looking ahead and instead of striving to learn to focus on each day one at a time. This is day seventeen of detox (no alcohol or caffeine) allowing me to embrace boredom rather than worry about what comes next with a glass of vino in my hand. When I get bored I pick up a book or stare at my children's feet longing for the days they fit in the palm of my hand. I have listened intently to my daughter crunching on cheerios while she reads and I have noticed subtle changes I would have normally missed as my eleven-year-old son enters puberty. It has only been two weeks since we hit the road but really it has been almost five months since Covid-19 thrust us out of our complacent, blinded, rigid and scripted lives. I can't remember the last time I had absolutely nothing to do and nothing planned in the upcoming months. In fact, I am pretty certain that stillness was never a reality for me. For now, I am content staring at the sea and listening to the laughter of my children, the chirps of the birds, the crashing of the waves, the chatter of nearby families, and most importantly, the voices inside me that I have quieted for too long.